There is no ‘if’, only ‘when’.
Stress is the killer of ‘control’. I can say without a doubt that the times in my life when I have ‘acted badly’, I have been stressed out. For me, there are 3 major stressors and 3 basic solutions.
We have become a world of people who often choose to behave badly. I’m sure there are many reasons for this, but I believe one of the main factors causing our emotions to be on a ‘hair trigger’ is the increasing amount of pressure in our lives. Spanning all across the board from the vast political world stage, to the routine lives of everyday people, there is a growing tension that can not only be felt but also seen through people’s noxious choices.
Just sit back quietly and observe. I mean, people are losing it, right?!? If everyone had tiny pressure gauges hovering just above their heads, you would see millions of itty bitty needles sitting ‘in the red’. I’m one of them. The hits just keep on coming, and it doesn’t look like it’s going to let up any time soon.
There are however, two sides to the ‘stress coin’. On one side lies circumstance. This is something that is so often out of our control. On the other side is response. ‘Response’ is the tricky one, because therein lies the realm of personal responsibility. Personal responsibility means that there will be no one left to blame but myself if I handle the situation incorrectly.
Even the dogs are throwing tantrums!:
I have often said (and truly believe) that 5% of the ‘bad’ things that happen to us are circumstantial, and beyond our ability to control. But, about 95% of the problems we end up dealing with are because of our own poor choices. When I react with a less than optimal response out of stress, I inevitably end up shoveling even more hardship onto the pile that I now have deal with on top of everything else.
Coping correctly under pressure is a skill. We will save ourselves, and those around us, immense heartache if we learn how to practice creating responses that are characterized by ‘measured control’:Coping correctly under pressure is a skill... Click To Tweet
3 Major Stressors And 3 Basic Solutions
Physical Stress ~ Yes, I often (often!) feel lousy. Knowing this, I have learned to be aware of my ‘patterns’. Frequently, I can predict when I will feel at my worse and subsequently, when I will most likely have the energy needed for a task. If at all possible, I arrange my schedule around my ‘good time’. Mid-morning for me is best, and I almost NEVER plan anything in the late afternoon hours, knowing this is usually a difficult time for me. Self-care also falls into this category: Scheduling periods of ‘rest’ has become a necessity for both my mental and physical well-being (which in turn benefits those around me).
Financial Stress ~ There just never seems to be enough $…or is there? Honestly, my financial situation has not improved, but my perception of it has. I’ve learned to choose not to be bummed out that my $1000 in savings is now being depleted by the fact that my dog has an abcessed tooth that needs dealing with. Or, the fact that we were ahead for the month, then the tire on my car blew out which caused us to just ‘break even’ for the month. How do I look at this and not get anxious? Because, there was provision for what was needed when I needed it. No, I don’t have an extra $1500 sitting in my savings account racking up interest. What I do have is a healthy pup, and a safe vehicle…I can be depressed or thankful…my choice.
Relational Stress ~ Simply put? Cut out the DRAMA, and CONTROL YOUR TONGUE! Following a simple rule could be the key: ‘If you have something to say about a person that you would not say to them face to face…KEEP IT IN YOUR HEAD! For so many of us, simply thinking more about what we say before it comes out of our mouths could save us from that ol’ life sapper known as; ‘Unnecessary Conflict’!
What suggestions do you have to lessen the relentless parade of stress in life? Please comment below to let me know. I welcome all the good advice I can get! 😉We will avoid immense heartache if we learn to respond with 'measured control'. Click To Tweet